Yeah it was a long sabbatical but is alright, I good now!

I am Re, Re what you say! re-everything!!! I have a tale for this Wednesday.

Ah few years ago this book name “The Secret” come out and everybody and the grandmother was talking about it. Ah mean Hellooo!!!  Oprah said it change she life, but then again ah lot a books and people does change Oprah life. I admire she open mindedness. ***Hint, hint Tulip!!! Jus sayin’ .

Now because I am strong and I refuse to be influenced by all kinda propaganda, I just let it pass. I mean really, ah already have tulip to preach she nonsense, why I need a chuppid book tuh tell me wha she already know?  An on top ah dat Tulip does bounce she gum free of charge. So why I have to pay fuh a book?

On my sabbatical I decide that I going and look fuh something. The something is me eh people, jus in case yuh didn’t get dat! Had tuh find Nirvana, become one with the universe. You get the drift.

So I decide to try this online Yoga class fuh relaxation, so it have to be good for me right.  This class for relaxation eh but this man was talking so damn much and taking too long to move. Ah had to stop the video because the man was getting me irritated. Wha’ de ass was dat? Cheups! Next!!!

So I went out and search the fuh de masters. Ah find Master Appleton, the infamous spiritual leader Grey Goose, Sensei  Saki and  Mr Porto open some doors fuh me boy but in the end all ah dem leave me dry and with a headache.

So I went deeper an ah started thinking! Yes Tulip, I know yuh doh like when ah do dat eh but gyul, this was some serious thinking. I going spiritual.

So de other day ah was deleting files from my hard drive and right there was a digital copy of ‘The Secret”. Unlike Tulip, I very open minded and I on a journey now, so ah decide I goin an listen to it.

what do i have to lose? Well the music kinda yoga-ee  when it start, so be warned, and I find they well long to get to “The Secret”. It was a lot ah blah, blah, blah. Yuh see how Tulip mess me up, I trying to enlighten myself so I could enlighten you even more and she just sticking sheself in meh head.

Well I was inspired. These people an dem so inspirational dey inspire me. Ah few days after dey inspire me, somebody share a post on Facebook and I had an aha moment! I knew what I had to do.

Please allow me a moment to share with you the eye opening quote.

Now just sit for a moment and read those words!!! Have you ever read something so pure?

“The Secret” masters tell me dat ah had to do it eh and I resisted.  Then de quote come an slap me in meh face, so ah had no choice. I had to do it!

So  D.I.M was born! It is now my duty to Decipher Inspirational Maxims and in the spirit of sharing, I am also dedicated to telling you why you should beat your children!  Now doh write me and tell me how wrong that is, because if you can tell me that there was never a time in your child rearing years that you did not want to reach out and touch the behind of your child. The masters tell me that I need tuh tell yuh that you is a liar!!!

I am not telling you tuh beat yuh children. I am simply offering suggestions as to why you may want to 🙂