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Ah yes, it’s another wonderful Wednesday.  The sun is up and the birds are out and about, making a lot ah blasted noise but oh gosh dey so pretty!

Now I was going an update allyuh on this whole exercise nonsense and how great(not) it going.
Now it seem like I have to speak up for this poor woman who just happen to have the name Tulip and everybody think I talking about she.
The woman getting harassed by people now. Why allyuh soooo?????

Assuming that she was really Tuilp, the only person who have to harass she is me! And well it have Magnolia because Tulip does always sell she out. An well it have she children who she decide she doh have to take care of now because dey adults now and oh yeah, it have she sister dat she does try all she speechify business on too, is not just me. Then yuh have dem people that she feel she have to tell how less than intelligent dey are but because they so chuppid dey doh even know that she telling dem that they chuppid.
Wait a minuite I know it doh sound like I defending she eh, but I am! I really am!!!

Now Tulip was  very distraught because somebody, Last name “Polo”, first name a derivative of “Marco” tell she to tell me that he doh understand the beaner language when it write down. Beaner!!!! I go write a dictionary so that allyuh could translate the words!

It do have a lot a things that does bother me but it seems that once you have ah accent that is not: British, that accent sexy doh, Scottish, yeah that with a  Kilt  and them nice legs… Damn!!!!, French, ohhh la la!!!, just drop yuh cloths now, right now! Even the heated Spanish accent, ole.

What was I saying? Gosh my mind gone off.  Yeah accents, dialects,  yuh does take the time to understand dem other ones. Well Mr Polo by the time I finish with you. you go be multilingual. You will learn a new dialect, including the words dat I make up, words, mind you that I think should be words and in the dictionary but Webster AND Tulip decide dat dey not having none ah dat!

As you know I am a kind and generous person, if yuh want something translate to foreigner, no problem. We here fuh you man. Doh worry!  First lesson, is not “mon” like alyuh ignorant foreigners like to walk around and say eh! is “man” with a twist!

As I am a very fair person to, so I will not respond in anger. I woke up this morning, sat on the side of my bed, took in a deep breath and exhaled “whooo saaaaa!!!”.  Again deep breath, exhale “whooo saaaaa!!!”.  All I will say to that is this”. My name is Joy, if yuh want to read the “Queens blasted English”, go an read ”Dear Abby”. I doh hear nobody telling Dr Phil anything when he drop into he southern drawl.

The same way allyuh does stop and concentrate to learn another language, sit yuh brain down focus and translate. We know allyh know what it mean but allyuh just doh want to admit that you do!

On top ah all ah dat, Tulip done tink dat she is the diva of dictation, the guru of grammar , the sultan of speech. I doh need nobody else jumping on she bandwagon. She done too much to handle as it is! Jus Sayin!

Joy!
Have Yourself A Wonderful Wednesday!