Change! Well we all know it inevitable right, an it seem everything getting simpler and simpler but in some cases it just too simple. Ah mean soon we go end up like them people in in Wall-E who just exist tuh eat and float around on some hover chair with ever ting catered to dem. But den again, I want some bodies tuh cater to me but dat different. #skynetcomingfuhallyuhtail! Jus’ Sayin’!
Say hello to emoji’s.
I confess I does use them too eh but ah didn’t know what I didn’t know. Just like de transformers, it have more to them than meets the eye. My child tell me color ah these emojis does change the meaning. Buhwhadeassisdat???
As allyuh know ah really doh like talking too much. Ah will even go on record as saying that ah actually prefer tuh text. De fact that I does miss most of meh messages and see dem the next day (if yuh lucky), is irrelevant Tulip!!! Doh judge me! Ah mean most ah de time ah doh even know wey meh phone is but ah getting better.
Emojis is one ah meh pet peeves. One can be cute, I go give you up to 3 but lordddd, whadeass people!!! allyuh like allyuh doh know when tuh stop. Allyuh does use it too damn much. TOO DAMN MUCH!!! Did I say Too Damn Much?
I apologize fuh dat outburse, it musta been gas. OK so de other day I was talking to one ah meh children. The gyul was ah little upset because of some bacchanal she and she friends having.
Apparently one ah de group members answer a message with de wrong color fuh some emoji. Now I not up on all de nonsense that these children going on with nowadays eh but ah not too bad. So chuppid me ask what difference it make. Well who tell me to ask dat. The look I get from dat gyul, lord have mercy. If looks could kill. So instead ah chuucking (poking fuh you foreigners) out she eyes, ah do meh 10 second meditation and listen to what she was saying.
Well yuh know now I curious, ah went tuh de interweb tuh do meh own research because yuh know Google know everyting. Allyuh the colors is a whole conversation, without having a conversation. Yuh doh even have tuh cuss off anybody anymore, all yuh have tuh do is use the right color emoji. whattroubleisdis?
What is dis world coming to? Yuh cyah even call sombody an ass, either tuh dey face on on the phone? What happening? Not only do different colors have a different meaning but the same color could have different meaning depending on the context. Allyuh we doomed!!! Doomed I say.
Just look at this:
Yuh have a blue heart, green heart, yellow heart, purple heart, red heart sparkling heart tipple heart envelope heart, what de ass is ah envelope heart?
See the blue heart could mean deep attraction, stability or it could mean an interest in sexual water sports, a fetish for BSDM .
I need tuh get my damn head outta de damn water, what de ass is a sexual water sport? So yuh KNOW I sending Tulip all blue hearts now.
De vegetarians and dem does look fuh love with ah green heart but it could also mean a sign of possessiveness. I cyah say nothing about them veggies because yuh know some ah dem does come after yuh with a vengeance if yuh dare tuh disagree with dem. Now I understand why Tulip so.
Yellow is , youth purity, sunshine and ah bunch ah other cutsy things.
The purple one is glamor and wealth but it doh seem to have anything tuh do with de actual one given tuh soldiers.
So it seem that the emojis teking over. We not even getting into these blasted acronym dey like tuh use because they cyah spell words anymore. One ting I refuse to do is to abbreviate my words I text it jus de way I say it, ask Tulip! My children does send me some messages an ah need a blasted code book to decipher what the ass dey saying. What is dat? Ah doh like them an I doh use dem, oh gosh wait ah lie, I use “lol” about 10 time since it come out and ah feel so shame.
As fuh me… I lazy, every damn ting yellow, it have too much damn emoji’s tuh scroll through, so I stick to the first 3 pages. Oh lord, ah lie again, de only time I go pass 3 is tuh use the skin toned emoji’s.
Dey say that words matter, but now allyuh have tuh watch allyuh ass because emojis have power now too! So all ah allyuh who out dey pelting out all kinda different color hearts, allyuh watch allyuh self! Dey have dem astute people like Tulip out dey, yuh better watch yuhself or handcuffs and chains might be the guest at you next rendezvous!
Jus’ Sayin’.
So what’s your favourite emoji?
Have a Wonderful Wednesday!