Let me break it down. Without meaning to be derogatory to “Financially Screwed”. Of those 10 men, we have 7 confirmed Daddies and 3 who just think they might be Daddies. Since she is obviously in financial straits, I think it’s safe to assume that her selection of men was not that great and she is definitely and eternal optimist.

Dear Joy

Thanks for your column.  Where were you all this time? My life would have being in a better space if you were around earlier.   But as they said better late than never.

 I know this man who’s life seem to be getting worse and worse as we speak.   Can’t seem to hold down a job.  Have no skills or trade underneath his belt.  Don’t want to work at fast food restaurants or jobs that he thinks is below him.  People always helping him after he gets what he wants you don’t hear from him. Everyone is tired of being spit in the face and kicked you in your ass.

He also lies and tell the employer that is mom is sick or dead and need time off.

What should I do?

Thank you

Tired of holding hands

Dear Tired of holding hands,

Thank You!

Now this is a toughie!!!

I am a fan of birds. Now some of them are quite noisy and you want to take a big stone, and knock them off the branch so that they’ll be quite while you sit with your glass of wine and  enjoy the outdoors. Crows be warned!

With that said, I hate Pigeons!!! This man is basically what I call a Pigeon child. Once you feed them, they never go away. They just wait for you to feed them and shit all over you after you do.

My dear Tired, he is not the problem, the problem are the bleeding hearts that surround him. Simple question, if you can sit on you’re a$$ and do $hit all and still get money, food, shelter and I’m sure he has a woman, so he gets his little piece when he wants, would you not do it? Hell, sign me up!

Don’t blame him! Why should he stop doing what he’s doing. When my good pal Dr. Phil asks him “how’s that working for ya?” Guess what he’s gonna say and guess who will have the biggest blasted smile on his face? I guarantee it won’t be you.

Why should he work? Of course the jobs are beneath him, he would have to be a fool to take such a menial job. Hello!!! He has servants and nonprofit organizations taking care of him. Go Pigeon man, take me to. I want sugar people.

I am a fan of Game of Thrones, so do what they would  do to free loaders. You don’t like what the person is doing, cut off his head. Oh yeah, in todays civilized society, that seems to be frowned upon, so we’ll try something else.

On those days when his mother is supposed to be dead, it would be a great time channel Michael Jackson. Get some zombie make up on, hobble down to the workplace and tell that employer to hire him back or else!

And finally the hardest part. I know this is drastic, and it might be a little mean. I sure that nobody thought of it before because it’s soooo far fetched,  not to mention teriffying!!! Are you ready…  STOP BLASTED HELPING HIM!

Follow these simple steps and you too will attain happiness and clarity.

 p.s:  A subtle hint G.O.T style. If yon man haseth naught hands, yon man haseth naught to keepth thee shackled! In other words If he doh have no hands it doh have nuthin fuh you  tuh hold on to.  Those chains will jus slide off! Jus saying!

This is one of those few times that I like to use my awesome wisdom for good. In order to avoid a repeat of last week’s “Financially Screwed”.

Daddies and Mommies , teach your girls, or she will end up with somebody like “Tired of holding hands is dealing” with.