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Good lovely morning people,
Trioka, sounds like an alien name or some planet they would find in the original Star Trek series. I bet Tulip know what troika means! Doh feel embarrassed if allyuh doh know eh!
Well after I decide to give the pretzel a rest, I join the gym with a fem-bot. Not just any fem-bot. Is ah fem-bot from the galactic planet Exercisor! I mean this woman had an episiotomy and three weeks after she gone back to she doctor cussing him because she wasn’t healing properly. She tell the man he didn’t do something right. Why you ask, because Femzilla was out playing tennis, basketball skating and all the sports she was doing before she had she baby. And guess what? She wasn’t healing properly, so she blame the doctor. So just so allyuh could feel my pain, that is who I dealing with.
So yeah, first day back. I am ready (not) and looking forward to getting my sweat on (not) and we start with the trainer. We want to start off a good foot, so we want a plan. well she want a plan, i quite content to play with the 5 pound weight. At the end of this I picturing Hale Berry in the cat suit. Even though it a horrible movie, she looked damn good as it sank! Jus Sayin!
Now 30 minutes into this thing I feeling like I going an dead, right dey on the gym floor. I see some kinda stars and flashing light, I tell you Jesus was coming fuh me boy. Then here she come, the Exercorian standing over me,”You can do it, just two more”. All I could think in between the gasping for breath , is take your blasted ass out of my face before I give you two more ah something , well as soon as I can catch my breath and I doh feel like puking and I spend a few year building up some kinda physical strength, two more my flipping ass!!!. Just give me a minute!. Yes, I will thank you later when I can do it but today is not de damn day and now is not the blasted time!!! So BACK OFF!!! But, instead I just groaned and did 2 more.
Even better, dat chuppid trainer watch me and laugh and ask me if I think it was going to be easy. Now I am of the firm opinion that there was a reason that God didn make me like John Cena cause a lot ah people woulda done dead aready. I shouldn blame God yuh know, I really just plain lazy. That is too much work to get like that and too much work to maintain it.
Do I think It should be easy? Hell flipping Yes!!! I think it should be bestowed open me. I believe that I should get up in the morning and deicide what I want to look like today and BAM!!! It happen. I will change my name to Mystique and we good. This exercise nonsense should just disappear. NOW… if Idris Elba was training me, well lord you go have tuh peel me off a dat floor before I leave that room. All I need is ah exercise ball tuh sit on and him to demonstrate how to do all the exercises. I immediately turn chuppid and he go have show me multiple times how to do dem exercises. But I digress!
So after day one I went and show off my guns right. I mean after all,… Hello!!! I had to show Tulip how awesomer I was aready. So there I am talking about myself and then she come and ask me if I going to the gym with Magnolia. So I back back, “wha de ass? Magna who?”. What??? Like Magnolia coming to thief my thunder? Nah, nah, she cyah be awsomer than me! Dat not happening. Like this going to come down to blows and if it come down to blows then Tulip better be on the ready cause she need to take care ah dat!. A little addendum to dat: after what happen tuh Ruby, Magnolia transform into Black Dahlia and now I fraid. I thought that Tulip coulda protect me but is seem that de Black Dahlia have some kinda super power. But say what, the Black Dahlia go have a weak moment and then Tulip will pounce and take she down and teach she ah lesson. Of course that will be after we make sure we use some elephant tranquilizers on she cause we doh want she waking up.
Ok people, I tink is time fuh ah P.S.A (Public Service Announcement fuh allyuh who doh know). Now I doh have nothing against a naked body eh, #IdrisYumYumElba but oh gosh people… is a gym is not yuh private bathroom. I doh need to see anything hanging or jiggling, especially from people I work with. Allyuh does put allyuh naked ass on the seats in the gym. I do now what leaking outa allyuh orifices (is that plural for orifice Tulip?). How allyuh expect me tuh sit on dat, nah dat not happening!!! An I have cloths on. People does put dey shoes on dem seats because they too lazy to bend all the way over. Allyuh know this, allyuh does be right dey when it happening!!!! Oh looorrddddd!!!!! Allyuh people nasty. Dat is beyond unhygienic! So STOP IT!!! Jus Sayin’
2 responses to “Sexy back – De Troika!”
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Firstly I love Magnolia and her Sybil Black Dahlia these two just saying something .. I think it was great of Magnolia to go to the gym on her own trying to defy time and spaces that no longer gap .. You go My Woman get them Curves as mouth watering as possible revive your inner Vixen ( .. you too Joy Lawd I hope you survive Magnolia went about it alone for a reason .. (I am assuming).. Now in defense of Black Dahlia how could the women be so fast with “No fault” then who hit Ruby ?! Listen .. All is to say Joy you should feel safe with Tulip and Black Dahlia aka Magnolia .. Those Sisters seem to keep it real .. only soo much process people we can take in our lives ..