Dear Madame Joy,

The past three has been a particularly rough time for me.  In fact, I would go so far as to say that it’s been the worst few years of my life.  I talk to my friends about it and it does help sometimes. There is one friend in particular that always tell me the same thing “It could be worse. There are people out there in worse situations than you”. She even suggested that I am only interested in talking about my own problems.

Madame Joy, I know it could be worse and I know there are  people out there in worst situations than mine but I find my friend’s constant reminder that it could be worse to be very insensitive. After all this time she still does not seem to understand what I am going through. Right now I feel that I should just stay away from her, Am I wrong?

Don’t got my back

Dear Don’t got my back

Thank you!

I hope your luck will soon change for the better.

Real friends are supposed to be there to support you in your time of need and it seems like you have a good support system.

We are allowed to feel sorry for ourselves,  as long as we don’t get caught up in in. Ask “Why me?”, deal with it and move on. Yes, there are worse situations out there but that does not negate yours.

You mentioned 3 years, maybe, just maybe she’s just fed up of your constant complaining, is it possible your friend is just tired of hearing you talk about the same thing but do nothing about it?

It is possible she’s hearing “wah, wah, wah”, when you talk? Is it possible that you are using your friends as a receptacle for your misery and not thinking about how it affects them.

The fact that you seem to tell your business to all these people kinda tells me that you like the attention. If it’s a selected group and not everyone you know then, my bad.

After hearing the same thing for three years, people will get tired of it. It loses the effect and they will just humor you then talk about you behind your back.

Try asking your friends about what’s going on in their lives, the change will help distract you. You’ll be surprise about what you did not know you did not know about your friends. Life has its ups and downs and we have to fight through the downs but it’s worth it in the end. If it’s too much for you and obviously it is, you need to seek professional help!

If it’s none of the above, then you need to drop her sorry ass and just hang with your real friends.

Follow these simple steps and you too will attain happiness and clarity.

p.s: If you are all mutual friends, I guarantee that this particular friend is not the only one of your crew that thinks like that. Just saying!

Thank you for selecting us as your emotional crisis advisor. We are here for you!

Madame  Joy

Joyspirations© Daily Advice:

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.