Dear Madame Joy,
I am a young mother of a 13 month old and last week I saw a commercial aimed at first time parents. In the voice over announcer talked about the different stages of childhood . He said it was ok for the little girl to have a tantrum because it was a normal part of growing up.  Her Dad was very understand and supportive of the little girl while she had her episode. My husband thought it was nonsense but I thought it was great step forward, it’s something to help first time parents.

Madame Joy , how do I convince my husband that there is some validly to this?
Babies R Us

Dear Babies R Us,
Thank You!

Validity, look what’s going on with the kids that were raised by books? I’m with your husband here.

Maybe it’s the season but I read your letter and I had a ghost of Christmas past moment. I went back to 1970 and I brought my mommy and my 2 year old self to the present time.  I just happened to be in the middle of a 2 year old  tantrum but my mother was surprisingly calm. I would show my mother that words work just as effectively.  My mother sat and watched the video. She listened as they talked about understanding and allowing your child to experience this situation and how it  was just a normal part of growing.  She commented on what a nice father this little girl had and then she smiled, got up and calmly walked over to 2 year old me and said “understand  this”, WHAP!!!!  My little backside started to sting and I just shut up! “Now you sit yuh little tail down and keep quiet”. And you guessed it, I did.  On top of that she walk over to the future me and drop a back hand because I waste she time to bring her to the future to show she this chupidness, so big me sit down and shut up too.  2 year old me decide that she was quiet for long enough and decide she’ll start  again.  I just see my mother turn her head  slightly in slow motion and somehow the eyes keep moving  and the head dip to the side and lord have mercy but 2 year old me went to sleep right away.

Now I in no way condone the actual use of a rod on a child but you know sometimes, just sometimes, them little gangsters need a little whattap.  Doh tell me you never thought about it cause I know you lying.

My dear, I hate to say this but you must underhand that your first child is your Guinea pig child. You know it’s true.  They unfortunately are the recipients of your inexperience. All the mistakes you made with them, you learn from and don’t do it again.  Inexperience does not negate common sense. I guarantee you I knew the meaning of “NO” by the time I was two.  Yes they will have their episodes and they are allowed , but to a certain extent.  As tempting as it may be, it is not necessary to discipline by spanking. Don’ let them fool you, these little creatures, know what they are doing.  It’s up to you to call them on it.

This is not leave it to blasted beaver and make no mistake, this is war and they will take you down it you give them the chance.  So you MUST take them down first.

Follow these simple steps and you too will attain happiness and clarity.

p.s. Just remember these will be the people that will take care of us when we old. You know that means that we all doomed  right!!! Just Saying

Thank you for selecting us as your emotional crisis advisor. We are here for you!

Madame  Joy

Joyspirations© Daily Advice:
If you have never been hated by your child, you have never been a parent – Betty Davis